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CHAPTER XXVIII
There is no
need of going into an extended recital of our suffering in the small boat
during the many days we were driven and drifted, here and there, willy-nilly,
across the ocean. The high wind blew from the north-west for twenty-four
hours, when it fell calm, and in the night sprang up from the south-west.
This was dead in our teeth, but I took in the sea-anchor and set sail, hauling
a course on the wind which took us in a south-south-easterly direction.
It was an even choice between this and the west-north-westerly course which the
wind permitted; but the warm airs of the south fanned my desire for a warmer
sea and swayed my decision. In three
hours — it was midnight, I well remember, and as dark as I had ever seen it on
the sea — the wind, still blowing out of the south-west, rose furiously, and
once again I was compelled to set the sea-anchor. Day broke
and found me wan-eyed and the ocean lashed white, the boat pitching, almost on
end, to its drag. We were in imminent danger of being swamped by the
whitecaps. As it was, spray and spume came aboard in such quantities that
I bailed without cessation. The blankets were soaking. Everything
was wet except Maud, and she, in oilskins, rubber boots, and sou’wester, was
dry, all but her face and hands and a stray wisp of hair. She relieved me
at the bailing-hole from time to time, and bravely she threw out the water and
faced the storm. All things are relative. It was no more than a
stiff blow, but to us, fighting for life in our frail craft, it was indeed a
storm. Cold and
cheerless, the wind beating on our faces, the white seas roaring by, we
struggled through the day. Night came, but neither of us slept. Day
came, and still the wind beat on our faces and the white seas roared
past. By the second night Maud was falling asleep from exhaustion.
I covered her with oilskins and a tarpaulin. She was comparatively dry,
but she was numb with the cold. I feared greatly that she might die in
the night; but day broke, cold and cheerless, with the same clouded sky and
beating wind and roaring seas. I had had no
sleep for forty-eight hours. I was wet and chilled to the marrow, till I
felt more dead than alive. My body was stiff from exertion as well as
from cold, and my aching muscles gave me the severest torture whenever I used
them, and I used them continually. And all the time we were being driven
off into the north-east, directly away from Japan and toward bleak Bering Sea. And still we
lived, and the boat lived, and the wind blew unabated. In fact, toward
nightfall of the third day it increased a trifle and something more. The
boat’s bow plunged under a crest, and we came through quarter-full of
water. I bailed like a madman. The liability of shipping another
such sea was enormously increased by the water that weighed the boat down and
robbed it of its buoyancy. And another such sea meant the end. When
I had the boat empty again I was forced to take away the tarpaulin which
covered Maud, in order that I might lash it down across the bow. It was
well I did, for it covered the boat fully a third of the way aft, and three
times, in the next several hours, it flung off the bulk of the down-rushing
water when the bow shoved under the seas. Maud’s
condition was pitiable. She sat crouched in the bottom of the boat, her
lips blue, her face grey and plainly showing the pain she suffered. But
ever her eyes looked bravely at me, and ever her lips uttered brave words. The worst of
the storm must have blown that night, though little I noticed it. I had
succumbed and slept where I sat in the stern-sheets. The morning of the
fourth day found the wind diminished to a gentle whisper, the sea dying down
and the sun shining upon us. Oh, the blessed sun! How we bathed our
poor bodies in its delicious warmth, reviving like bugs and crawling things
after a storm. We smiled again, said amusing things, and waxed optimistic
over our situation. Yet it was, if anything, worse than ever. We
were farther from Japan than the night we left the Ghost. Nor could I more than roughly guess our
latitude and longitude. At a calculation of a two-mile drift per hour,
during the seventy and odd hours of the storm, we had been driven at least one
hundred and fifty miles to the north-east. But was such calculated drift
correct? For all I knew, it might have been four miles per hour instead
of two. In which case we were another hundred and fifty miles to the bad. Where we
were I did not know, though there was quite a likelihood that we were in the
vicinity of the Ghost.
There were seals about us, and I was prepared to sight a sealing-schooner at
any time. We did sight one, in the afternoon, when the north-west breeze
had sprung up freshly once more. But the strange schooner lost itself on
the sky-line and we alone occupied the circle of the sea. Came days of
fog, when even Maud’s spirit drooped and there were no merry words upon her
lips; days of calm, when we floated on the lonely immensity of sea, oppressed
by its greatness and yet marvelling at the miracle of tiny life, for we still
lived and struggled to live; days of sleet and wind and snow-squalls, when
nothing could keep us warm; or days of drizzling rain, when we filled our
water-breakers from the drip of the wet sail. And ever I
loved Maud with an increasing love. She was so many-sided, so many-mooded
— “protean-mooded” I called her. But I called her this, and other and
dearer things, in my thoughts only. Though the declaration of my love
urged and trembled on my tongue a thousand times, I knew that it was no time
for such a declaration. If for no other reason, it was no time, when one
was protecting and trying to save a woman, to ask that woman for her
love. Delicate as was the situation, not alone in this but in other ways,
I flattered myself that I was able to deal delicately with it; and also I
flattered myself that by look or sign I gave no advertisement of the love I
felt for her. We were like good comrades, and we grew better comrades as
the days went by. One thing
about her which surprised me was her lack of timidity and fear. The
terrible sea, the frail boat, the storms, the suffering, the strangeness and
isolation of the situation, — all that should have frightened a robust woman, —
seemed to make no impression upon her who had known life only in its most
sheltered and consummately artificial aspects, and who was herself all fire and
dew and mist, sublimated spirit, all that was soft and tender and clinging in
woman. And yet I am wrong. She was
timid and afraid, but she possessed courage. The flesh and the qualms of
the flesh she was heir to, but the flesh bore heavily only on the flesh.
And she was spirit, first and always spirit, etherealized essence of life, calm
as her calm eyes, and sure of permanence in the changing order of the universe. Came days of
storm, days and nights of storm, when the ocean menaced us with its roaring
whiteness, and the wind smote our struggling boat with a Titan’s buffets.
And ever we were flung off, farther and farther, to the north-east. It
was in such a storm, and the worst that we had experienced, that I cast a weary
glance to leeward, not in quest of anything, but more from the weariness of
facing the elemental strife, and in mute appeal, almost, to the wrathful powers
to cease and let us be. What I saw I could not at first believe.
Days and nights of sleeplessness and anxiety had doubtless turned my
head. I looked back at Maud, to identify myself, as it were, in time and
space. The sight of her dear wet cheeks, her flying hair, and her brave
brown eyes convinced me that my vision was still healthy. Again I turned
my face to leeward, and again I saw the jutting promontory, black and high and
naked, the raging surf that broke about its base and beat its front high up
with spouting fountains, the black and forbidden coast-line running toward the
south-east and fringed with a tremendous scarf of white. “Maud,” I
said. “Maud.” She turned
her head and beheld the sight. “It cannot
be Alaska!” she cried. “Alas, no,”
I answered, and asked, “Can you swim?” She shook
her head. “Neither can
I,” I said. “So we must get ashore without swimming, in some opening
between the rocks through which we can drive the boat and clamber out.
But we must be quick, most quick — and sure.” I spoke with
a confidence she knew I did not feel, for she looked at me with that
unfaltering gaze of hers and said: “I have not
thanked you yet for all you have done for me but — ” She
hesitated, as if in doubt how best to word her gratitude. “Well?” I
said, brutally, for I was not quite pleased with her thanking me. “You might
help me,” she smiled. “To
acknowledge your obligations before you die? Not at all. We are not
going to die. We shall land on that island, and we shall be snug and
sheltered before the day is done.” I spoke
stoutly, but I did not believe a word. Nor was I prompted to lie through
fear. I felt no fear, though I was sure of death in that boiling surge
amongst the rocks which was rapidly growing nearer. It was impossible to
hoist sail and claw off that shore. The wind would instantly capsize the
boat; the seas would swamp it the moment it fell into the trough; and, besides,
the sail, lashed to the spare oars, dragged in the sea ahead of us. As I say, I
was not afraid to meet my own death, there, a few hundred yards to leeward; but
I was appalled at the thought that Maud must die. My cursed imagination
saw her beaten and mangled against the rocks, and it was too terrible. I
strove to compel myself to think we would make the landing safely, and so I
spoke, not what I believed, but what I preferred to believe. I recoiled
before contemplation of that frightful death, and for a moment I entertained
the wild idea of seizing Maud in my arms and leaping overboard. Then I
resolved to wait, and at the last moment, when we entered on the final stretch,
to take her in my arms and proclaim my love, and, with her in my embrace, to
make the desperate struggle and die. Instinctively
we drew closer together in the bottom of the boat. I felt her mittened
hand come out to mine. And thus, without speech, we waited the end.
We were not far off the line the wind made with the western edge of the
promontory, and I watched in the hope that some set of the current or send of
the sea would drift us past before we reached the surf. “We shall go
clear,” I said, with a confidence which I knew deceived neither of us. “By God, we will go clear!” I cried, five minutes
later. The oath
left my lips in my excitement — the first, I do believe, in my life, unless
“trouble it,” an expletive of my youth, be accounted an oath. “I beg your
pardon,” I said. “You have
convinced me of your sincerity,” she said, with a faint smile. “I do
know, now, that we shall go clear.” I had seen a
distant headland past the extreme edge of the promontory, and as we looked we
could see grow the intervening coastline of what was evidently a deep
cove. At the same time there broke upon our ears a continuous and mighty
bellowing. It partook of the magnitude and volume of distant thunder, and
it came to us directly from leeward, rising above the crash of the surf and
travelling directly in the teeth of the storm. As we passed the point the
whole cove burst upon our view, a half-moon of white sandy beach upon which
broke a huge surf, and which was covered with myriads of seals. It was
from them that the great bellowing went up. “A rookery!”
I cried. “Now are we indeed saved. There must be men and cruisers
to protect them from the seal-hunters. Possibly there is a station
ashore.” But as I
studied the surf which beat upon the beach, I said, “Still bad, but not so
bad. And now, if the gods be truly kind, we shall drift by that next
headland and come upon a perfectly sheltered beach, where we may land without
wetting our feet.” And the gods
were kind. The first and second headlands were directly in line with the
south-west wind; but once around the second, — and we went perilously near, —
we picked up the third headland, still in line with the wind and with the other
two. But the cove that intervened! It penetrated deep into the land,
and the tide, setting in, drifted us under the shelter of the point. Here
the sea was calm, save for a heavy but smooth ground-swell, and I took in the
sea-anchor and began to row. From the point the shore curved away, more
and more to the south and west, until at last it disclosed a cove within the
cove, a little land-locked harbour, the water level as a pond, broken only by
tiny ripples where vagrant breaths and wisps of the storm hurtled down from
over the frowning wall of rock that backed the beach a hundred feet inshore. Here were no
seals whatever. The boat’s stern touched the hard shingle. I sprang
out, extending my hand to Maud. The next moment she was beside me.
As my fingers released hers, she clutched for my arm hastily. At the same
moment I swayed, as about to fall to the sand. This was the startling
effect of the cessation of motion. We had been so long upon the moving,
rocking sea that the stable land was a shock to us. We expected the beach
to lift up this way and that, and the rocky walls to swing back and forth like
the sides of a ship; and when we braced ourselves, automatically, for these
various expected movements, their non-occurrence quite overcame our
equilibrium. “I really
must sit down,” Maud said, with a nervous laugh and a dizzy gesture, and
forthwith she sat down on the sand. I attended
to making the boat secure and joined her. Thus we landed on Endeavour
Island, as we came to it, land-sick from long custom of the sea. |